SPARKS BRIEF: Is Rihanna An Alien?

Washington, D.C. – Marjorie Taylor Greene, Congresswoman, former Waffle House waitress and Miss Georgia Peach Pit 1990, has demanded the search and capture of pop singer, Rihanna.

“She’s an illegal space alien and a threat to national security,” Greene said last night during the podcast— Anyone Can Be in Congress.

“Rihanna floated into the Super Bowl on a space sled and took the stadium hostage. Biden should have had the Air Force take her down immediately.” Greene believes the alien invasion started with the “so called” Chinese Spy Balloon.

"What kind of name is Rihanna? Clearly not from this earth. Where I grew up, regular names were Billy Bubba, Wanda Lou, Tammy June, Clovis and Pickles,” Greene said.

“Why weren’t spectators shocked? Greene stated Rihanna hijacked the game and brainwashed millions of American citizens. “She was clearly sending messages of world domination through some weird musical code, while guarded by a squadron of stormtroopers in white.”

“She’s the queen of her planet dressed in her fancy red spacesuit. All she was missing was a fashionable polar bear fur collar.

“The stormtroopers gyrated around her in some outer space mating ritual. By the end of the ceremony, she was pregnant,” she shuddered.

Greene asked Speaker of the House, Kevin McCarthy, to introduce a bill calling for the immediate seizure of all umbrellas in across the country.

“Star-Queen Rihanna kept saying ‘umbrella’ repeatedly. My Scooby-Do intuition tells me they’re turning umbrellas into satellites to send messages into space.”

A member of the House Committee on Homeland Security, Greene called for a color purple threat level to be activated. Members of the committee advised Greene there is no color purple. Greene said she absolutely knew there was. She’s heard Whoopie Goldberg mention it on The View.

The Congresswoman has tried enlist the FBI. She wants a nationwide search of all nursing homes. “According to the documentary Cocoon, aliens hide out among old folks. They blend in since aliens can be wrinkly and pasty. It’s the first place I’d look.”

So far, the suspected alien has not been located. One of Greene’s congressional aides told her Rihanna was from Barbados and might have returned there after the Super Bowl performance.

“I don’t know what galaxy the planet is in, but NASA must build a Death Star and blast it away.”

Greene told Podcast Host, George Santos, “We must hold Joe Biden’s wrinkled feet to the fire and make him take out these space invaders before he eats another early-bird buffet. If he won’t do it, I will!”

“I’m spearheading a Conservative campaign for capturing the galactic intruders. My slogan is Make America Human Again! Look for my MAHA hats, bumper stickers and beer koozies on my website– MTG-There’sSpaceInMyHead.gov.”

Comments

Waking Up in Vegas - Happy 2014!

Neither, Gary or I, are really gamblers, so we try to find other activities to occupy our time when visiting Vegas. We have visited Red Rock, Hoover Dam and Valley of Fire State Park on previous visits. We had even traveled as far as Zion National Park in Utah, during an earlier stay. There are definitely natural beauties to discover while in Nevada, and they have nothing to do with showgirls or stripper poles. This visit was about relaxation and ringing in the New Year, so we didn’t need to stray far from Vegas this time. We bought tickets for a concert featuring Kristin Chenoweth. She is a very talented singer and actress best known from Broadway shows, movies, and multiple guest appearances on GLEE. The concert was on New Year’s Eve at the newly built Smith Center. Although she is about three feet tall, Kristin has a powerhouse voice. She sang songs from her career and, of course, sang one of my favorites “For Good” from WICKED. It was a great way to ...

Mental Health - Destroy the Stigma

I believe that I am a fearless writer. I share my personal experiences, thoughts and beliefs. I’ve not been afraid to express my emotions. Self-expression is fundamental to writing. I am a man of my words Recently, I became concerned that my blogs about depression and mental health might shape my reader’s opinions of me in a negative way. The more I thought about it, I realized that I had internalized the stigma that surrounds mental health. Stigma is defined as “a mark of disgrace or infamy.” The word bears a negative connotation and it devalues the person to whom the stigma is applied. While the conversation about mental health is receiving a larger forum, damaging misconceptions are widespread. According to surveys, there are between 42.5-46 million adults in the US that have some type of mental illness. Statistics show that one in four adults experience mental illness in a given year. These numbers of individuals are all impacted in some manner b...

Summer Adventures Part 2 – The Backyard Backlot to Broadway

My childhood summers weren’t all the glitz and glamor of vacationing with cousins, wobbly shopping carts and bloody feet. Actually, most of my summer days were spent right at home in my yard. My parents never took a vacation. Our family never packed its bags and took off for other ports of call. I never boarded a plane, a boat, or a train for a family adventure. My adventures were self-created. They were products of an imaginative mind that could travel to the moon, ride the rapids in the Amazon Jungle and lead a battle for the Knights of the Round Table, all before a lunch of Spaghettios with a side of Hawaiian Punch . I have always loved going to the movies. This helped provide the inspiration to my over active mind. The Saturday afternoon matinee was a childhood staple for me. The smell of fresh popcorn as you entered the lobby and the crisp cold air of the air-conditioned theater helped set the atmosphere on those hot, summer afternoons. I would get lost in the d...

Depression, Drugs & DNA

When diagnosed with Clinical Depression, my doctor recommended medication to help the illness. The art of medication management can challenge professionals who need to find the right drug and dosage that will be effective for treatment. It’s frustrating for patients combating the effects of depression when their medication doesn’t quite alleviate the symptoms. Part of this cocktail of drugs can also cause intolerable side effects · Sleepiness · Insomnia · Dizziness · Weight Gain · Headaches · Increased Anxiety · Sexual Problems · Nausea The feeling of hopelessness and frustration is just compounded when you’re waiting for relief that never really arrives. There are so many drugs available...

Communication - The Art of Words

I read a posting, a few weeks ago, that the song “Enjoy the Silence” by Depeche Mode was celebrating its 25 th anniversary. The song, released in 1990, speaks of how you can be beyond words. It relays the message that there are times when words can’t describe feelings or emotions and seem inconsequential. I do understand when people say that something is “indescribable.” We all have moments when we just want silence and time to appreciate the world beyond words. A feeling or an emotion can be hard to verbalize at times, but are we ever beyond words? We have to realize that if we want a space of non-communication we have to communicate that. We can’t “Enjoy the Silence” unless we can tell everyone we want silence. For people to know we are at a loss for words, we have to tell them that. Everything we say and do lies in communication. We could not function as a community or a society without it. We don’t stop to contemplate that our whole world is cr...

Sparks Ignites

Search This Blog