Philadelphia, PA – Millions of pet owners woke up this morning to empty dog and cat beds. This follows Trump’s announcement, during the presidential debate, that Haitian immigrants are eating people’s pets. Now, scores of four-legged fugitives are trying to escape the crockpot. Peter Pawson, manager of the Pup & Puss Hotline, said they’ve received thousands of calls concerning missing pets. “Not only are the pets gone so are their beds, toys and food. This is happening across the country not just in Springfield, Ohio. We've had reports of a Mastiff stealing its owner's car in Alabama and an encampment of dogs playing poker in the New York subway. “Miss Muffy left and took her kitty condo, all her Fancy Feast® and basket of her catnip squeaky toys,” Eileen Leasher from Pasadena, California told Pawson. “She scratched out a note but I’ll need Cesar Millan to interpret it.” “My Pomeranian, Sugar Pie, took her four puppies, and my Louis Vuitton luggage and headed for the hills,
Official Vince G. Sparks : Writer • Blogger • Storyteller